I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
