I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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