I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
