I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
i just had sex bonerless
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Randomize
