Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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