sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
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