i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
