is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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