Non-Jews are for practice
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
How naked do you want me to be?
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
