why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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