Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
