bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
