Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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