And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize