If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
