all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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