I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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