I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
