Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Your cock deserves a montage
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Couch. On fire.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Randomize
