i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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