Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Randomize
