I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
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