Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
