Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize