dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
We don't watch enough power rangers
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
