Dual....:-)
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
