I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
