scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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