highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
