stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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