so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Randomize
