I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
