he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
