i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Randomize
