The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
i think i have herpe
just one?
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
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