I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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