Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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