with your own penis?
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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