i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
