I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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