You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
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