Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
