things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Randomize
