dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Randomize
