I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
