I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
