he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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