When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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