found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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