Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
