party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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