I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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