I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I intend to get homeless drunk
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize
