my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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